 | Morbid Insanity (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=92.2){kind=small} morbidinsanity) wrote, |
Day after the fallout...
Well...Today was the first day Ive seen Melissa since our big "issue". Overall it was good, we went to applebees for lunch and to toys r us and to a few other places and I picked up her christmas present and got some ideas for other gifts...OH and went to see Aeon Flux..GREAT MOVIE!. I just have one small problem with today..and I probably shouldnt be writing this but I cant really talk to her directly about this. From the time we got together till the time we left each other I heard about John, for one reason or another. Now understand I have no problems with her friendship with him, I just kinda have a problem with him being the very top of her conversation after the things she has told me. I realize by writing this that I will probably irreparibly damage our relationship but I have to get this out someway and theres noone who would understand directly so this is really the only way. It eat at me most of the day and all the way home. It just hurts so bad she never mentions me in her journal anymore, and all she ever talks about anymore is john and its ripping me apart because I know she want to be with him. Anyway long day tommorow, so im going to bed.
December 12 2005, 02:27:25 UTC 6 years ago
December 12 2005, 03:42:26 UTC 6 years ago
"Now understand I have no problems with her friendship with him, I just kinda have a problem with him being the very top of her conversation after the things she has told me."
So as you can see and as I have said before, I have ZERO problem with you being friends with him or hanging out with him or even being at his house. What I DO have an issue with is everytime we talk, everytime I read your journal, and when we were together trying to work on whats wrong with us all you talk about is John, I have to be honest with you..when I got up in the theater, I was going to leave, I couldnt handle it anymore, it was killing me, but then i said to myself, no, I love this girl too much, so what did I do.I went in the bathroom, splashed water on my face to take away the tears. came in that theater and showed you my love for you. Now I dont wanna think that you dont care how I feel about it but you do know and you have for a long time becuase you used to do the same thing to me with Ben, everytime we talked it was something about him and you continued till I finally snapped.
And just a final note. I know there is nothing between you and john because he views you as one of the guys, but youve made it clear that you want something and thats why it hurts so bad.
i love you and goodnight